Superficial Ex-Friends From My Past

So I'm minding my own goddamn business at work, just doing my thing. In walks three of the most hated people in my life. Two are twin sisters, one is their "omg my bff Jill!".

One of the sisters got knocked up so she had to get married. The other got married and THEN knocked up. But I digress. They each have a boy, and I rarely see their husbands with them. But whatever.

So they walk into my store, and I can't help but laugh. They're both pregnant. Again. Ok, these girls got married when they turned 20. It's been what, three years? You're so eager to have sex, you can't wait until marriage, but it takes you three years to fuck your husband again? You know, the guy you couldn't keep your hands off? Yeah.

So they walk in and they totally ignore me. Even though I'm like, all over the place, putting shit away. I'm first assistant manager. I'm not going anywhere real soon. You come in again, I'll still be there. But, I'm a good sales person and I go up to them and make them feel comfortable. Or, uncomfortable in this case. Soon after I promote the sale, they want to leave. Because they fucking hate me.

Why do they hate me? Because I didn't fall in love with a guy at 19 and screw him and have a baby. Because I'm not married because I have to be. Because I'm not pregnant and miserable like them. Because I'm not afraid to wait for my man, who may still have to go back to Afghanistan. Maybe even because I'm still a virgin. Jeeze, I don't know.

Maybe it's because I'm not like them. Growing up, we wanted to be badass. Even "omg bff Jill" tried to be badass in that "holy shit, i'm ominous and silent like Neo, lookatmedamnit" way. I was the spazz, growing up. I still am. But I control that spazz now, somewhat. It's like the Force Lightening now. I channel it in specific situations. I maybe crazy, but I'm not crazy enough to ruin my life just because I wanted to be fucking awesome, fashionable and have sex appeal at the wrong time.

And check it out. I'm not just fucking awesome. I am 7 kinds of awesome. I'm not just fashionable, I'm classic sophisticate. I don't just have sex appeal, I have honor and patience too.

And that my dear ex-friends, is what separates me from you and the rest of my generation. You thought distancing yourself from me would make you cooler. You thought dumping me in the name of prestige would get you somewhere. You thought honesty was out of style, so you shoved me out of your life.

Yeah. Look who's on the catwalk now. And it ain't the pregnant girl.